Or maybe I’m not

Last post I bragged about how I was really starting something– a new sweater about which I was SO excited. And I was. Until I knit the bust in two nights, tried it on and realized it was too big. For a day I pondered the question: Do I continue knitting and live with an ill-fitting sweater or do I rip? I decided to rip out and start again. However, it took me a few weeks to get around to ripping it and flushing two days work (not that my time is THAT precious, but still). Finally I just went for it– destruction–and now I have a pretty ball of yarn sitting, waiting for me to start again in size small. 

In the meantime I’ve accumulated a heap of sewing projects: baby blankets, a jersey knit dress, tulip skirt, and a few stuffies for some (more) babies who just cropped up. But I’m sitting on all of it. The easy part is done. The projects are picked out, the fabric is purchased, washed and ironed. The dress is even cut, the pattern for the skirt is as well. But for some reason my mind can’t seem to meet the battle of the sergers, sewing machines and tension. But that’s all that’s stopping me and that’s really a bummer, particularly because I’m in great need of some summer clothes. Since I’ve made a resolve to buy no new clothing for all of 2009 (I can only make or buy second hand and revamp) this is my only option. I had hoped that desperation would drive me to conquer my fear of malfunctioning machines, but it hasn’t helped. 

Any suggestions? Between my failure to create, my job that is not rocketing me to success or even a comfortable lifestyle, my inability speak more than one language and the fact I don’t workout on a regular basis I’m feeling pretty loser-ish. How do YOU do it? Get motivated? Get started?